Crave’s Original docu-comedy series, I HAVE NOTHING, drops Saturday, Sept. 23 at 9 p.m. ET with all six episodes, immediately following a special screening event at the Just for Laughs Festival in Toronto featuring star Carolyn Taylor and special guests. Created by Taylor, and produced by Catalyst and Blue Ant Studios, in association with Bell Media, the series follows Carolyn (BARONESS VON SKETCH) on a comical quest to choreograph the perfect, full-length pairs figure skating routine to Whitney Houston’s 1992 iconic hit song, “I Have Nothing.” The series will be available to Crave audiences in English and French.
Motivated by a teenaged obsession for the 1988 Calgary Olympics that also sparked Carolyn’s queer awakening, I HAVE NOTHING begins as a lighthearted nostalgic comedy and quickly morphs into a high-stakes, real-life mission for Carolyn, with a few wild detours along the way. Joining Carolyn on her mission are legends from the world of figure skating including Sandra Bezic, David Pelletier, Ekaterina Gordeeva, Brian Orser, Kurt Browning, Paul Martini, Barbara Underhill, Katarina Witt, Tara Lipinski, Kristi Yamaguchi, Adam Rippon, Elladj Baldé, and Elizabeth Manley, as well as award-winning comedian, actor, and writer, Mae Martin. Guest stars include Jully Black, Sabrina Jalees, and Elvira Kurt.
The season culminates in a performance of Carolyn’s one-of-a-kind routine, performed in front of a live audience of figure-skating royalty, die-hard skating fans, and Carolyn’s teen idols.
Episodic synopses are outlined below:
Episode 1 – Package For The Bird
- After years of dreaming, Carolyn finally begins her quest to choreograph a pairs figure skating routine to Whitney Houston’s 1992 iconic hit song, “I Have Nothing“. First step: find her skaters.
Episode 2 – Do You Know About The Cold War
- Carolyn gets a reality check from some Olympic medalists, but finds her groove with a social media superstar.
Episode 3 – Love is Pain
- Carolyn tries to learn everything she can before her first rehearsal, with the help of some 1988 Olympic skating royalty.
Episode 4 – No Longer A Joke
- It’s the first rehearsal, and Carolyn is struggling to convince her Olympic skaters that any of this is a good idea.
Episode 5 – Today Is Wednesday
- With two days left to choreograph, Carolyn throws the skaters an Olympic curveball. Then, suffers separation anxiety when they leave.
Episode 6 – Buffoon Makes Good
- Dream and reality collide as Carolyn and her skaters prepare for the final skate. As the night draws closer and the audience loads in, Carolyn tries to stay calm.
